Headlining News:

Shortage Of Lox Threatens To Impact Break Fast For Millions of Jewsimg_4738

A recent shortage of lox is threatening to ruin the break fast meal for throngs of Jews. Lox, which is smoked salmon, is an important component for the meal that follows the end of Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement and the holiest day on the Jewish calendar.

The lox shortage, which was caused by protestors shutting down major smoke houses across the country to shed light on the issues surrounding overfishing and sustainable seafood, could not have come at a worse time for Jews who observe the holiday, which includes prayer and fasting for more than 24 hours. When asked to comment on the news that there might not be lox at break fast, one observant Jew expressed his dismay by saying, “No lox?? What the heck am I going to put on my bagel? Cream cheese just isn’t enough. This is a complete disaster.” The man, who did not want to be identified, added, “I don’t think I will be able to fast knowing there is nothing for me to look forward to afterwards.”

The recent lox shortage has been also affecting Sunday brunch routines up and down the East Coast and other regions and has also been a problem for people sitting Shiva, the seven-day mourning period Jews observe following the death of an immediate family member. One woman stated that losing a loved one and lox at the same time was adding insult to injury and that “people really didn’t understand how much something like lox means to you until it is gone.”

A small but resourceful group of people, who had heard rumors of a possible shortage, bought extra freezers for their homes in advance of the crisis and has been stockpiling lox for months. One man, who wished to remain anonymous for obvious reasons, proudly showed this reporter his personal supply of lox and noted it was all nova (“no belly lox in my house!”), adding that he was prepared to defend his home against anyone who tried to “take a schnipple.”

With bagel and appetizing stores reeling from the shortage, some business owners have been hiking prices on their remaining lox supply and have been subsequently subject to price gouging fines. Several suppliers have been caught trying to sell various other fish, including cod and bass, that they had dyed and smoked to look and smell like lox. The governor commented that “it’s deplorable for these businesses to take advantage of people at their lowest moment and we will enforce the law to the fullest.”

Further details will be reported as they occur.




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